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Because I'm the Dad / September 2012 / The Verdict

Sep 21, 201207:49 AMBecause I'm the Dad

Parenthood through a Father's Eyes

The Verdict

Last week, I asked for your help on whether or not I should allow my 16-year-old daughter, Grace, to get her ear cartilage pierced.

If you remember, she challenged me to write about it (see last week’s blog here.) I believe her words were, “Go ahead, do it. When everyone tells you it’s OK, you won’t be able to change your mind.”

I quickly reminded her that while we might live in a democracy, those freedoms do not always carry over across the threshold of my front door—at least while she is living there.

Well, the results are in and I have to admit I was very surprised at what I read. Despite being told I was too strict and being called a “helicopter” by one reader (it’s OK, I have thick skin), your thoughts were kind of all over the board.

Posts appeared on the Central Penn Parent website, on our Facebook page and even on my personal Facebook page. Of course, Grace had to leave her comments as well. I read every one and I came to a decision—well, more like a compromise.

Many of you stated that she sounded like a good kid. At least she asked before she did it, and as long as she does well in school, I should lighten up and give her a little slack. Well, you are right.

Grace has always been a great kid. She is an excellent student and, more importantly, a good person. In the past couple years we have really seen her grow into her own person. She has surrounded herself with a great group of friends—the kind of kids that never hesitate to come up to you and say, “hello.” In fact, we took her to a party a few weeks ago and when we pulled up to the sidewalk, there were no fewer than 20 teenagers playing volleyball in the yard. As soon as they saw us drive up, they all stopped, waved and yelled, “Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Cochran!” When she stepped out of the car, they all whooped and called her name. She ran to them and we drove off smiling.

My daughter is the kind of person who worries about everyone else. She will lie awake at night trying to think up solutions to other people’s problems. She never hesitates to offer a smile or a helping hand to people she doesn’t even know.

She is a bit of a ham and she admits it. She’s definitely the class clown and her online profiles are proof of that. I can’t believe how she is always tagged in pictures and those shots never fail to see her in the middle of a group usually cracking someone up.

So, you are right. She is a good girl and she does respect her mother and me. She didn’t just go out and do something only to beg for forgiveness later.

That doesn’t mean I like the idea of the piercing, but it did force us to sit down and talk about it.

The decision was we will wait until she turns 17 in January and if she still wants to get it, she can. Secretly, I am hoping that some of your comments ring true—that she’ll be on to something new by then. But we’ll see.

Central Penn Parent’s editor Andrea Ciccocioppo (who, by the way, voted for Grace, despite my advisement) suggested that we make it a family event and all attend the piercing itself. She even thought it would be cool to video the piercing for the website.

Sorry, Andrea, there is just no way that Daddy will sit there watching that. When the day comes, I will be at home, in a dark room going through Grace’s baby book probably experiencing a sharp pain in my ears.