Oct 29, 201210:14 AMPlain Jane
Because Moms Can't Be Afraid to Tell it Like it is
Sorry, Michelle Obama
I just read this article about the "Top 10 Worst Halloween Candies for Kids." First of all, what candy is terrific for kids? Isn't "candy" by definition supposed to be unhealthy and artery-clogging?
Of course, our children would be better served if we all handed out fruits and vegetables on trick-or-treat night, but I am positive my house would be egged if I offered broccoli and carrots. Could you imagine THAT reception: "Trick-or-treat! ...WHAT is THAT? Vegetables?? Hey Lady, this isn't a Hidden Valley Ranch commercial!! C'mon!"
Didn't we all learn our lesson a few decades ago? Remember the much hyped razor-laden apple scare of the 1970s? I couldn't, not even for one moment, consider handing out a Golden Delicious. Thus, I am raging fully against the First Lady’s anti-obesity campaign and am going to buy three of the items from that list. Then, mom rebel that I am, I will scoop up handfuls of these offensive treats and happily deposit them in every goblin's bag that darkens my doorway.
Besides, Snickers Minis (which tops the list) are better than almost anything—except Gummi Bears—that I encounter in a calendar year. I'm talking date night with the bald man, a foot rub and uninterrupted Dr. Phil time!
Give the kids a break. This is Halloween for Pete's sake! Shoving "healthy everything" down their throats will eventually lead to a rebellion. I am pretty certain that our wee ones will rise up like the machines in The Terminator, except they will be hungry and deprived.
So don’t feel guilty tossing out candy to the little ones this week. They'll love you for it. They will also probably not "Be back!" once you hook them up. Sorry, Michelle Obama.